dear world, today was my last day in belgium. my feelings are impossible to describe, surprisingly sadder than expected but at the same time looking forward to being home again and seeing everybody, but overall its sort of a feeling of...nothing. just..blah. i've had the experience of a life time, and have journaled almost every day of it. for that, i am forever grateful, and i will never ever forget my time here. the people i've met, the places i've been, the things i've seen, everything has made my experience unique and wonderful. teary eyed jamie is not a common sight, but we all knew it would happen eventually. its not even that sad, actually. its just weird! saying goodbye to everything and everybody. my life will never be the same, and so really, i'm happy. i am content. im proud of myself, i've done my best almost all of the time and i really have grown as a person. its something nobody will ever be able to understand, and nobody will ever be able to take away from me. to all good things there is an end, my friends. its not even something ending that really matters, its what i'm going to make of it and how i will use it for the rest of my life. its sort of like love, its never over! (or so they say in "the notebook"...ya know, the movie.) haha! so today. today, today, today. this morning i woke up like any other day, got ready, and went downstairs to eat some BREAD and have some coffee! after that, my host mom was so kind to help me totally finish packing, stuffing cookies and clothing in every last corner of my suitcases! after tons and tons of double checking and rearranging tonight, i think my suitcases are set to go. well actually, right when i thought everything was ready...i received an AMAZING present from my class! i had a few people over after school to say bye for one last time, it was sad and nice and just..good. my class gave me like a 5 pound box of chocolate bars, it was sooooo awesome and beautiful because they all signed their names on a chocolate bar and on the box :) it was also funny, because i made cupcakes in ice cream cones and when i went to serve them BAM! half of them fell on the ground. oh well. live and learn. hopefully i don't spill anything tomorrow? such as items falling out of my suitcase because its so stuffed!!! but yes. it was nice to say goodbye, although saying goodbye is never nice. does that make sense? so i had my share of teared eyes with the girls from the class and there it was. who knows when i will see them again, hopefully i can comeback on a trip here someday or maybe i'll even see some of them in the US someday! sometimes its a smaller world than we think. for the rest of today, it was sort of relaxing. actually, not really. i tried to go to the post office with my host mom to send a 10 kilo box, but it was like 200 grams over and so she had to go back home and get tape and then re-seal the box after i took things out of it..boooo! tonight we had spaghetti. my host mom asked me what i wanted to eat for the last time here and for some reason i chose spaghetti. comfort food or something? after dinner manuella came over because shes spending the night to get up with us at 5am and drive to the airport with my families! i love my families here, and i love everyone that i've met here actually! where does the time go. i really have no idea how its even over, i mean i know i'm going home a little early but still..thats 9 months of my life that went by in a snap. for all i know, i could be dreaming. maybe we're all just dreaming anyways. but to end this all, i have a quote, of course. quotes never do enough justice, but sometimes it can sum up how you feel a little bit. so here ya go! “If you want a happy ending, that depends, of course, on where you stop your story.” -Orson Welles. im so thankful and blessed to have had this opportunity. my exchange year was the best the decision and best experience of my life. belgium, you will always be in my heart!!!!!!!!!!!! thank you for the great year, EVERYONE! <3 hugs and hugs and hugs from jamie the girl who loved to blog in belgium. ps: here's my speech video! and i'll write something when i'm safe and sound back home.